Category: Writers Block
Please listen,
When I ask you to listen to me and you start giving me advice, you have not done what I asked.
When I ask you to listen to me and you begin to tell me why I shouldn't feel that way, you are trampling on my feelings.
When I ask you to listen to me and you feel you have to do something to solve my problems, you have failed me, strange as that may seem.
Listen!!!
All I asked was that you listen, not talk or do -just hear me. . ...
Advice is cheap: 20p will get you both Claire Rayner and Denise Robertson in the same newspaper.
And I can do for myself, I'm not helpless. Maybe discouraged and faltering, but not helpless.
When you do something for me that I can and need to do for myself, you contribute to my fear and inadequacy.
But when you Accept as a simple fact that I do feel what I feel, no matter how irrational, then I can stop trying to convince you and can begin to understand what's behind this irrational feeling.
And when that's clear, the answers are obvious and I don't need advice. Irrational feelings make sense when we understand what's behind them.
So please listen .... and just hear me
And, if you want to talk, wait a minute for your turn, and I'll listen to you.
I like it, sugar sugar. grin
That's so true.
They say it's impossible to listen and talk at the same time, and I guess that's true. But it's good to be reminded of that at times.
Bob
Aww Danielle. This is so true. I've had experiences where a person will just talk right over you... Then when they actually give you time to speak, they hear but they actually haven't "listened" lol if you get my drift!
Michelle
Danielle,
I wish I had the nerve to send that to my Mother! She is the absolute worst at always having the smart answer.
Mel